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| Can you see me? That's right...I'm there, but I do want to be invisible to that young foolish whippersnapper! |
For starters. You already know that cats have servants, humans do NOT have cats. There. Now that we have THAT down, here goes.
About two weeks ago my servants took that whippersnapper Wiggles-whatever-his-name and trapped him in a cage. Good. Very, very good servants! Perhaps my servants had finally got the message that I did NOT want to keep that whippersnapper, and they were returning him to wherever they got him. Go servants! Go Wiggles! Never return, please, thank-you very much!
As that whippersnapper rightly cowered in his cage, I came up to him. My servants weren't looking. Perhaps they thought I was giving a little love and sympathy to the creature. Far from it! I go up the to door, give that whippersnapper a look of I-don't-EVER-want-to-see-YOU-again, and hissed. HISSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS! My servants were appalled at my behavior. Quite frankly, I was appalled by THEIR behavior! How DARE they like that trouble-making whippersnapper? As I said, all he does is make trouble, rip up their clothes, unroll the toilet paper, and give em' plenty of claw marks and bites. And that doesn't include all the trouble that he causes ME! HISSSSSSSSSSSS! Maybe, I thought, that whippersnapper was finally going back to where he came from, and I would once again royally reign unperturbed over my kingdom.
Sadly, I was wrong. A few days later, my very naughty servants brought that whippersnapper home again, thus invading my kingdom! HISSSSSSSSSS! Yeah, I told that to that whippersnapper, you can be sure! For a few days anyway, most of the time he was caged up. But then my naughty servants would let him out! Very naughty servants. Now that whippersnapper has free reign of the house! Can you believe it? At least, between the hours of 10pm and 6am they cage him up in the bathroom...
Now I have finally figured out why they took him away. They took that whippersnapper to the vet, and the vet took off his front-paw claws. GOOD! GOOD servants.....if they DO have to bring him back, at least he is minus his front claws. That helps a lot when we're fighting together....he has his paws, back claws, and teeth, and I do too. While I don't want to tell too many people, I think that de-clawin' and my constant teachin' have helped that young squirt some. He's not picking a fight with me so much anymore. Now, he just tends to eat, sleep, and sleep some more when he's not getting into my servants stuff. Good.
Well. I must go now, and retreat to my cave under my servants' bed. Goodbye.
His Royal Highness,
King Emperor of the Entire House,
Pumpkin Pie the First
His Royal Highness,
King Emperor of the Entire House,
Pumpkin Pie the First
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